Awe-inspiring and miraculous moments. There is no greater joy for me than knowing Jesus. When I sit in prayer, I feel a physical sense of spirituality, a sense of beauty in my bones. The love of Jesus. I cannot deny this example of love, beauty, and being. There's a sense that I can see him. I smile, my heart rests, and my face lights up. The more I learn about him, the more I want to know. Studying His life is an incredible experience that cannot be compared. But still I am missing out on so much, I still have a lot to learn. As I learn more about His ways, I am inspired to let go so much so that I may become more like Him. My only thought when I think of "being like Him" is love. What can I do to love people? He teaches me again and again despite my many failures. Being able to love people is one of my greatest strengths. There are times when I forget to love because of my pain and hurt in my heart. During the moments when I twirl in a tunnel and forget, I pray to the Lord to let me be freed from it so I can move toward love. I take a deep breath and remember that love is the core of all things. In all my relationships, it brings understanding and growth. The way He embodies love and compassion continually inspires me. To become the best version of myself, I will continue to practice patience, grace, and love like Him.

With Him in my life, the light beams in, the beauty awakens my soul, and I live a life full of abundance. Everywhere I look, His work is evident, and I am grateful to be aware of it. For a long time I wondered why I didn't feel the intense joy others had described. Then in 2014, I began studying the Bible and started to move away from my own way of doing things. This has changed my life. In the last 9 years, I have experienced a new life, but I have grown at a new level. To feel joy like this in His word, in every deeper understanding, difficult or not, is something I have desired for so long. My trust is in Him. Every year I grow, but this stage in my life is an exciting beginning. There’s even joy in my sadness now, my heart is happy-laughing.

Mother Teresa once wrote:

“Joy is prayer, joy is strength: joy is love, joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.”

I'm learning to see joy in everyday moments, to find it in difficult times, and to share it with those around me. I'm grateful for my own joyful moments and times when I can bring joy to others. I'm thankful to God for the joy He has brought into my life.

This life journey, this faith journey has been like climbing stairs. Each new level my muscles strengthen, making me stronger. You can see it, it's coming and I am that much closer to the top, even when it can be so exhausting. I arrived and found something more beautiful. Here I thought this upcoming level was going to be cool, exciting and lovely and He showed up and said that's nothing! You're not finished climbing, keep climbing. This is just the crumble of what I have for you." It's a beautiful sight.