Tracy’s Story

Tracy Vitela

How do I tell you about me when I’m still figuring that out myself. Aren’t we all, or am I alone here?

My story is a blessing. Difficult, but indeed, my calling. 

I didn’t grow up in the Depression, I didn’t fight a battle with cancer. Still, my story is mine. I am going through my own life, recovering from my own trauma. A word I thought only belonged to war victims.

I always believed the word trauma belonged to those who came home from the war. Because they sacrificed their life for us. Understanding so much more about myself and realizing how my trauma has impacted me. Now, I grant myself permission to feel what I feel. Feel it, to heal it. 

I always identified as a single mom. Tell me about yourself, Tracy? “Well, I’m a single mom…But single mom life came with a lot of shame and criticism. People looking and talking down for choosing to be a mom.

I dedicated my life to the success of my children. To me, their success was happiness, safety, and their future, that was my goal. I wanted to educate them in all the ways possible before life did that for them. I fumbled plenty, I didn’t always get it right. 

Now at the age of 42, I am a newlywed, a business owner, a mother of two, one with special needs, a stepmother to three teenage girls, and we can’t forget mama to three sweet dogs. (Yes, I’m crazy) Asking me who I am now is simply, “busy.”

Listen, I am a warrior. Joshua 1 has been my guide.

I have failed miserably. I have made an abundance of mistakes, I fight depression, I struggle with anxiety, and I have my own learning disabilities. But I’m also a fighter, a compassionate human with endless amounts of love and empathy. I’m fast on my feet and I take action. I’m a writer, a believer of good, a willing participant in change. I am a truth seeker and a connector. I want to encounter people and I want to them to feel seen. Encouraged. Loved. 

But who I am is not just that. It’s bigger than me. It’s bigger than what I do, and what I don’t do. It’s bigger than what I say and don’t say. 

As I share my life with you, I pray God uses me in every way possible to help someone else out there. Possibly help someone not feel so alone. Feel seen and understood. There has been an abundance of pain in my life, but the love has forever been greater. The lessons have been my tools of life. That’s a gift. Forgiveness and protection through God’s mercy has been my anchor. Sure, sometimes hanging a bit lifeless and exhausted, but still hanging over it. At times though, I’m standing high on top of that anchor! Isn’t that what life is about? Never an even kill. Finding strength to continue, finding hope to anchor to. I can’t be alone in this? 

I pray every day that God use me.

As I tell you all my truth, I will breathe him in, and I will breathe him out every step of the way. I pray that he will give me the strength to be able to continue to share my truth with you, my story.

My words. Through my brokenness, through my dark days, through my glory days, through all my winnings and all my mistakes, my truth, all of it. I want to share my celebrations, my triumphs and even my faults. 

I will pray for the words. I will not hide my voice, I will not lower my chin, or turn my cheek. I will speak the words that might possibly help save someone else in their own story. God has saved me from myself.  And that’s a vulnerable sentence. But it’s my truth. 

Who I am is simple at the end. 

I am a Child of God, and this is my truth.